▲ all my life i have been unwanted, now it's your turn
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May 5, 2016 1:40:51 GMT -6
Post by CALYPSO SLATER on May 5, 2016 1:40:51 GMT -6
dreaming of you Caly sighed as she sat within the sand, her blond hair wisping within her face by the breeze that had settled into the coast. It was a nice breeze, the gentle smell of fresh air and salty water brought a sense of calm to the young halfbreed. But her mind was anything but calm, the young girl was deep in her own thoughts of torment. Of hate. She hated her mother, for what she put her through. For denying her the right to live like a normal girl.
Picking at her nails she sighed out sharply, maybe there was something wrong with her and fate was denying her the right to be happy. Because she was bad, she was not meant to be part of this world. Of their world, hell at least that's how Calypso felt. There was a misplaced burning resentment for her sibling, even though she did not know the girl. She simply hated her for living the life that she never got to have. Tears stung her eyes then, causing them to lightly fall from her lashes as she looked down at her wore down nails. "Is it because i'm broken, that i am not meant to be loved? Is it because i'm flawed that i can't be part of your world...what did i do... to make you hate me? What did i do to not get the chance to know him... to play with her. You made me the monster that i am... you made me hate her, for being happy. For being loved. You made me hate you... the only parent i ever known... you made me hate you and i hope you suffer... because i have suffered." She murmured to herself, thinking about her mother before she pushed herself to her feet.
She had to get rid of these thoughts or else her abilities would consume her once more, so she began to walk. Where to? She didn't know, she just needed to get away... to focus on something else. Anything else. It wasn't long before she came across a row of boats, each grand in their own design caused the young halfbreed to stop. Casting her gaze up in wonder and curiosity before she looked over her shoulder, surely no one would mind if she took a peek at their boat? Chewing her bottom lip she moved upon the wooden docks. Listening to the creaking of the boards underneath her converse shoes before she made it upon the deck of the ship. Her fingers slowly traced upon the ropes that pulled the sails, hand moving toward the captain's quarters and peered inside. Nobody was here, but there were signs of life due to the empty pizza boxes and grade papers that littered the bed. Which made Caly curious but not enough to interrupt too much privacy before she turned away from the Captain's quarters to move to the wheel. Smiling softly to herself, her hands slowly touched it as if she was afraid to break it. Her blue eyes holding wonder for the craft before she drew her hands away, sighing softly.
"I've seen enough, better go before i get caught..." She muttered under her breath as she popped in her earbuds, the song the days of the phoenix by afi playing as she made her way across the deck toward the bridge before she bumped into someone and tried grabbing for whoever she bumped into. Clearly taking them and her clumsy ass into the water with a big sploosh. This couldn't get any worse... now could it? She'd probably go to jail for trespassing so why not just let herself drown? She watched the figure as she drifted downward, huffing mentally at the fact that her ipod was now ruined by not all that miffed seeing she was going to let herself drown. Maybe this was the way she'd go, maybe this is what her fate entailed... who knew. She just wanted to stop being in so much pain... to be wanted. To feel loved. first calypso post and hot damn ♡
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▲ you're not alone
fisherman/little league coach
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Post by FREDERICK O'MALLEY on May 12, 2016 3:24:12 GMT -6
sucking in a deep breath, freddie gripped at the bed sheets, both hands tightening around the light fabric. he was drowning again. chest heaved with each attempt to refill his lungs, eyes squeezing closed. slowly, he began to count within his head, despite that rarely ever working. like a panic attack, these vicious assaults crept upon his waking. as if the nightmares weren't enough, his suffering was prolonged by merely opening his eyes. the visions of that night... they were still so vivid. the kid may have stopped running, but there was truly no escaping the past. intoxicated or not, freddie should have used his judgement, he knew better... how could he have been so stupid? brandon was only eleven years old... he hadn't even begun to live, and yet, there he was... rotting away in a grave. it should have been frederick. why him? why was he given a second chance? he didn't deserve to have one... he didn't deserve to be alive.
loosening his hold, freddie eventually brought a hand to his face, rubbing at his bloodshot eyes. it felt like weeks since he had a good sleep, which meant more than four hours a night. on the outside, he was perfectly fine. the individuals of san francisco had pegged him as an oddball fisherman, one that wasn't headed anywhere special. he was wasting his life, that was a term freddie heard quite often. despite the constant negativity, there was something nestled inside of him, a subtle push. call him crazy, but it felt like bran was still reaching out beyond the barrier of death, telling his brother that it was okay, that he wanted frederick to be happy. it was a strange sensation, perhaps even one that couldn't be explained. but hey? it didn't really matter, the world already thought that he was different. no point in trying to change their minds.
sighing lightly, freddie lifted himself to a sitting position, eyes gazing out the window before getting out of bed. his routine was always the same: shower, get dressed, eat, then head out to the boat. but, those weren't his plans for today. no, a trip into the city would be needed, seeing as he was getting fairly low on supplies. since freddie rather preferred catching his fish early in the day, he was planning to scratch that task all together. what was one day off, right? not like he couldn't use one. after finishing up in the kitchen, freddie left the confinement of his little sea-side shack, starting up his old pickup truck before making his way toward the city. it wasn't that long of a drive, though the road seemed to stretch farther as his mind wandered. the guy was a constant worrier, if that wasn't already obvious. with such a soft heart, it was difficult to let certain things go. rolling to a stop, freddie parked in front of the store, yet he refrained from getting out right away. normally the kid was quite upbeat, even so much as pretending to be okay. but currently? there was a feeling he just couldn't shake.
once he bought the items needed, he hauled the box out of the truck, parking it beside his makeshift house. holding the cardboard in his arms, the male started toward the docks, intending to unload said supplies onto his boat for tomorrow morning. with eyes drifting to the setting sun, his attention strayed from the path before him. in a quick movement, he could feel his arm being pulled the box dropping from his hands as he fell into the water, his supplies along with him. struggling, the kid fought his way back to the surface, immediately choking on the water he had just inhaled. despite his own lack of air, realization hit instantly. someone had fallen in, having reached for him to help. without hesitation, freddie dove back under, ignoring his lack of oxygen. wrapping an arm around the girl's waist, he used the other to pull them back up.
it was like re-living his traumatic experience all over again, every notion the same. after gently laying the female down on the wooden docks, freddie's heart dropped. "caly...?" though their conversation was shorter than he would have liked, he did recognize the girl. "no no no, not again... please..." picking her up in his arms, his hand gently cupped at her cheek, while the other held her tightly. "caly... caly, open your eyes!" images of bran flashed across his mind, causing a pained feel to spread throughout his body. "please come back to me..." he couldn't lose someone else... not her.
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▲ all my life i have been unwanted, now it's your turn
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May 13, 2016 0:19:50 GMT -6
Post by CALYPSO SLATER on May 13, 2016 0:19:50 GMT -6
dreaming of you There was something so serene about drifting downward in the water, watching the sun shimmer just above the blue waves that gradually got darker as the world around her got colder. The water was cool and inviting against the warmth of her skin that was slowly fading to a clammy chill, but as soon as she felt the light sensation of drifting away. She felt an arm wrap around her waist, the current brushing against her unconscious face. Feeling the water break the surface, Caly began to feel her body slowly recuperating.
Feeling herself being rested upon the wooden docks, she heard a familiar voice but couldn't place it at first. The warmth of their arms and scent was welcoming, inviting. It made Caly want to wrap her arms around them and never let them go... but she couldn't move her body. No matter how much she wished she could. All she could do was listen to them weep for her to open her eyes, but her chest burned and her body was so very tired. Once she regained feeling within her cool hands, her left slowly reached up and caressed the hand that cupped her cheek. Before she knew it, her body began forcing the water from her lungs. Causing her to lurch to the side away from her savior and cough up the salty cool liquid that had filled her lungs. Gasping for air, her fingers curled into the docks as she breathed heavily. Her blond hair, hanging in tarnished gold rivulets around her face as she struggled to breathe.
Her blue eyes slowly drifted toward the one whom saved her and her heart as fast as it had been previously going was sent into hyper drive. He saved her? Was this his boat? Oh, how very embarrassing. But she felt guilty for trying to end it all when it was apparent that at least somebody would have mourned her passing. A deep flush collected around her cheeks as her arms wrapped around her chest. Having worn a bagging white t shirt and blue jeans, she was showing off a bit that she wasn't meant to be exposing and shivering like hell. "I'm sorry... i didn't mean to...tres...trespass on your boat." She stuttered before her eyes fell on the condiments that he had in his arms previously littering the waters and chewed her bottom lip. Due to her incompetence she made him lose what could have been what he needed to eat for the rest of this month.
Directing her eyes back at him, she noticed how scared and frightened he was. Causing her to without thinking draw her hand up and brush one of his tears away, before curling her fingers away from his cheek and quickly pull her hand away. "Um... i...i....i can replace those... here..." Scrambling to move her numb fingers she tried to fish into her back pocket, pulling out a wad of soaked twenty dollar bills. Setting it within his lap as she tried to push to her feet only to collapse back down. Wincing as she got lightheaded and nauseous, maybe the best thing to do was to sit there and recuperate. With chattering teeth, she began rubbing her arms as she sat there. Thinking to herself, what would have happened if she did not meet this boy? She knew his name, what was it? Glancing up at him, she mesmerized the color of his eyes... the way his arms hand felt when they held her in attempt to resuscitate her. She would have just been another Jane Doe that was another body in the body count that was steadily rising in this town, the news would have ruled as a suicide or an accidental death. But that's all that would have happened, she knew she would not have gotten a funeral. Have people miss her, after all she was an abomination to her mother and nothing to her father because he did not know she existed.
But... when she looked at this boy in front of her, Frederick. Part of her was happy he saved her, that he was the one to force her to keep living. To actually care. These thoughts made her cheeks flush again causing her to rip her gaze away from him once more, realizing that he'd probably think she was weird for staring at him the way she was and not saying a word. But damn she was cold. all the cutes!! ♡
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▲ you're not alone
fisherman/little league coach
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May 19, 2016 3:56:50 GMT -6
Post by FREDERICK O'MALLEY on May 19, 2016 3:56:50 GMT -6
waiting. that was the worst part... by the time he had pulled bran out of the water, it was already too late. there was absolutely nothing that freddie could do to save his little brother, and that within itself killed him. despite knowing brandon's fate, he held his brother in his arms, crying out for him to wake up. to hold on. it would be okay, everything would be okay... those words, repeated over and over. feeling his own body shaking from the cold, freddie laid down beside his brother, still clinging onto the young boy. bran had trusted him... looked up to him... it was all because of one stupid promise, one that he shouldn't have kept. the kid was so clearly intoxicated when they had first set out onto the water, he could barely walk a straight line, let alone steer a boat. what the hell was he thinking? for every reckless action there was a consequence, and brandon paid it. freddie killed his little brother. it was an accident, but it was still the truth. if not for him, bran would be alive.
god, he would have given anything to go back to that moment, to swap places. it should have been him... fighting against the frozen state of his body, which was beginning to shut down, freddie succumbed to the cold. brandon's still body was the last thing he saw, shaking as the pain became overwhelming. his brother was beyond saving, but the little shred of life residing in his being was transferred into freddie. without even realizing it, freddie had consumed the remainder of bran's soul. he woke up three days later in a hospital bed, bandages tightly wrapped around the wound he attained to his head. despite the pain he felt, freddie could only focus on one thing: brandon. he repeated his brother's name, over and over, asking the nurses where he was. where was his little brother? begging them, he tried to get up, attempting to pull the intravenous cord from his veins. the doctor was called in immediately, multiple hands forcing freddie down as he was given a sedative. he begged them not to... he just wanted to see bran, his brother needed him...
squeezing his eyes shut, tears began to roll down his cheeks. looking at calypso, it was like re-living the nightmare all over again. he was frozen in place, a shock prevented him from trying to get the water out of her lungs. why couldn't he move? he knew what to do... it wasn't like before. she wasn't in the water as long as bran, there was still hope for her. freddie wasn't going to let her die. before he could act on those intentions, he could feel his heartbeat pick up significantly at the sudden touch of her hand on his. eyes shot open, ease washing over at the sight of caly re-gaining consciousness. "oh, thank god." words merely brushed passed his lips as a whisper, voice shaking as he patted her back to help get the water out. "it's okay... you're okay." his previous patting turned to a light rub before she turned back to him, the light in her eyes only making his heart beat faster. she was beautiful, that much was obvious. but there was something else, something underneath her surface that drew the man in. in her presence... it felt like everything would be okay.
shaking his head, a faint smile pressed to his lips. "don't worry about it. i'm just glad that you're okay. besides, i did give you an open invitation, remember? so technically, you weren't trespassing." he was trying to lighten the situation, to ease her mind. then again, it was the truth. before he could say anything else on the matter, his chest began to tighten. the feel of her touch, hand gently brushing at his cheek... eyes closed for a moment, slowly blinking back open when she pulled away. they barely knew each other, yet she had the ability to make him feel so calm, at peace... it was like everything made sense, for the first time in his life. shifting his gaze for a moment, eyes skimmed over the water, catching sight of the sinking objects as she spoke. with a light chuckle, he turned back to the girl. "that stuff can be replaced." looking at her, his expression changed slightly. the look in his eyes... it was enough to see that her life clearly meant more to him than a few material objects. caly's life couldn't be replaced.
"i don't want your money." the girl could have died, yet she was worried about paying for a few items? shaking his head, he picked up the soaked bills, intending to give them back to her. almost immediately, freddie's arms reached out as caly collapsed, instinctively catching the girl. "it's okay, i've got you." holding her close, his eyes strayed toward the horizon, the sky was already growing darker. it would only be a matter of minutes before night fell upon the city, which meant the cold along with it. "you're gonna freeze..." glancing back down, a light smile pulled at his lips. "i'm gonna pick you up now, okay?" with one arm around her torso, his other snaked under her legs, carefully lifting her as he came to a stand. with an extremely cautious step, he moved onto the boat, going down the stairs and into the cabin. after gently setting caly onto the bed, he shuffled through a few drawers, pulling out a pair of sweat pants and a thick sweatshirt to match, along with a towel. laying the folded clothes beside her, he took a step back. "i'll let you uh... you can..." rubbing the back of his neck, an awkward smirk pulled at the corner of his mouth. "i'll be up there." pointing up to the cockpit, freddie walked back up the stairs.
standing by the wheel, freddie peeled off his wet shirt, patting himself dry with a towel. gripping the fabric within his hands, eyes remained on the darkened horizon. inhaling a sharp breath, he could feel the cold, icy winds clawing at his flesh just as they did that night. hesitantly, his hand moved toward the back of his head, immediately locating the scar with his fingertips. it all happened so fast... he barely noticed the deep gash when it first happened, adrenaline keeping him going for the sake of brandon. for such a wound, the blood-loss... he should have died. swallowing hard, freddie tossed the towel aside, pulling a dry long sleeve shirt on. shrugging off his soaked jeans, he merely hopped into another pair. with a hard expression falling upon his features, freddie stepped away from the wheel, sitting on the edge of the boat.
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▲ all my life i have been unwanted, now it's your turn
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Aug 30, 2016 22:24:28 GMT -6
Post by CALYPSO SLATER on Aug 30, 2016 22:24:28 GMT -6
dreaming of you Swallowing was hard, but she managed as he had picked her up from the wet dock. Her hands gripped tightly upon his wet fabric as she felt herself being lifted, causing her heart to race before her green blue eyes fell upon him once more. Taking him in, feeling secure but silly with being picked up. She wasn't used to this, she didn't think she could get used to this. It was all so new to her, so... fresh. Chewing her bottom lip she slowly rested her head in the crook of his neck and shoulder as he took her to the cabin upon his boat.
Feeling the soft fabric of sheets and covers, she felt his warmth leave her causing her to shiver again as he collected articles of clothing before setting them down beside her. She spared no time and pushed herself to her feet as she pulled off her t shirt that clung to her skin. Before getting ready to unfasten her bra before she looked up and flushed deeply. Grabbing the towel and covered herself as she listened to him. Face, red from embarrassment as he smirked and went upstairs with a few more articles of clothing.
As she dried off and got dressed, she pulled on the sweats. Running her fingers through her long damp hair as she dried it. Before she wrapped it around her, still feeling cold as she made her way to the cockpit having caught a glimpse of him just putting on his new pair of pants. She chewed the inside of her cheek as she folded her arms against her chest. The cool air running through her causing her to huddle within the towel before she made her way toward Freddy and sat down beside him. Staring off into the horizon briefly before she downcast her gaze to her blue painted toenails. Wiggling them to keep her distracted. The silence was awkward, strange even given this had been the second time that she had met the boy. Yet he saved her, she didn't know why. Nor why he would risk his life for hers, she was nobody wasn't she? Sure she was happy that he saved her, but what was his real purpose behind it?
"So...i don't expect to understand why you saved me, but... um..." She muttered, slowly looking at him then. There was a connection that was set within his blue eyes. Perhaps it was the fact that they were both hurt souls trying to survive. Caly didn't know, she had been trying to survive all on her own. Trying to live a normal life... always running. Always pretending. She didn't know where it ended or where it began. Hell she didn't know where she came from or who she belonged to. Her mother didn't want her. Her father didn't know her and her sister had everything she ever wanted. A family that loved her. A family that cherished her and remembered her. A family that wanted her. All that Caly lived without.
Calypso was angry. Jealous even, for the fact that she was cast aside while her sister got to have everything. All because she wasn't an abomination. She was perfect whereas Calypso was broken. Who would want her? Why would anyone want her?
These thoughts lashed at Caly back and forth, causing her to sigh deeply at the dangerous thoughts. Causing her blue green eyes to become glassy, on the verge of tears before resting her cheek on the boy's shoulder without realizing it. "maybe you shouldn't have... i'm not exactly the girl to save." As soon as she closed her eyes, stray tears did fall before she quickly wiped them away. Pushing herself to her feet before she could gain sympathy and drew her attention to the wheel of the boat. Her hands clasping the sides of the wheels in curiosity. She had always wanted to ride on a boat, had always wanted to venture out into the great blue. To escape the land, just for a few hours. But she never had the chance, well she could now but she wasn't the type to use people. But the eagerness and curiosity about the boat was too obvious to hide as her hands slipped away from the wheel as her back turn to Freddy as she rose on her tippy toes to look at the other boats upon the dock.
"How do you fishermen know how to control these things? If i knew i'd have had a boat ages ago and sailed away from this place by now." She exclaimed, having "forgotten" about her little sad episode as she tilted her head up at the folded sails upon the banisters. repost ♡
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